Giving up

I never had any desire to write a blog, to play the hero. But now things I only dreamed about are happening to me. Dreaming and regretting that I’m not one of them.

Life does not play fair, it taught me that much this far. I had it all when he decided to change the pace and the rules of the game.  It pulled the ground under my feet ... I went like Wile E. Coyote when the Road Runner bird fools him, and he does not understand at that time that it is the end of the road, so he is hovering in the air and the edges are a meter away... But that's life... The water currents change, you either learn how to swim or you drown. 

However, there is a trick, life gives you an incredible gift. The choice is only yours! You choose to stay in a cramped corner of the room. You choose whether you whine and moan. You choose every day, every move, you determine your future. And as soon as possible you see it and stop doubting yourself, the better. Do yourself a favor and hush the demons inside you say it is not feasible. Do yourself a favor and do not listen to people who are afraid of change, and that's why they criticize. Listen to yourself, your heart ... What is it that moves the world, and currently is not attainable? Go on, dare to, split up. I know you know what it is. Now the time has come to admit it to yourself.

But remember, dreams do not come true so easily. A lot of work, effort, time, to suffera lot of downs and bad excuses is needed. As your own, as other people. I remember two years ago I had them as well. There were a lot of good excuses in shortage of financial resources, because I am an employee, I do not have an association through which I can participate in the realization of my own dreams. And basically all it was just fear. Fear of the new, fear of the unknown. I did not have anyone to whisper the secret of the success of the fight against the darkness called fear .. It's simple, just step into the darkness and unbelievable but fear will run away like a scared squirrel ... And so every day, move the border ... dreaming and start thinking, opportunity will come and it is on you to grab it. Every time challenge yourself, from which your legs will froze in fear ... That is the only way forward ... Now I still have no money, and still have obligations to the company, but I have the support, a mentor to help me focus and .

Maybe I'm just a crazy intoxicated with the current success and the feeling that you’re accepted and supported, but it feels good. After a few years of constant falling, I started to fight, for myself, for my future  for earning potential, pushing the limits .. Who knows what will it all bring me, good or bad .. But then again, some things I’ll  "think about tomorrow ".

I want to say, show and prove that dreams are achievable. That after the fall you shouldn’t give up, but stand up and wipe away the dust from bloody knees and move on. No stopping, no turning back. Because no person shall afford themselves to stop. Giving up is a luxury that is not acceptable, ever, to anyone! Continuous operation must make results, and which ones only depends on you. Would you be satisfied with the results and this also depends on you. The question is whether you'll be able 20 years from now to forgive yourself. Are you going to look in the mirror and say, at least you tried? Or are you going to pass a familiar face with some wrinkles and a look of disappointment? Can you afford yourself to disappoint the future you because the present you has no courage? 

writtes: 

Aleksandra Borzaš (Novi Kneževac, Serbia)

Odustajanje

Нисам никада имала жељу да пишем блог, да глумим хероја.. Међутим, тренутно ми се дешавају ствари о којима сам само сањала. Сањала и жалила што нисам део тoга.

Живот не игра фер, то ме је досада научио. Имала сам све када је он одлучио да мења и темпо и правила игре. Извукао ми је тло под ногам... Прошла сам попут Пере Којота када га насанка Птица Тркачица и он не схвати на време да је крај пута, па лебди у ваздуhу а ивица је на метар од њега... Али то је живот... Водене струје се мењају или научиш да пливаш или се удавиш.

Међутим, ту је и трик, живот ти даје један невероватан поклон.  Само је на теби избор! Ти бираш да останеш скучен у углу собе. Ти бираш да ли ћеш кукати и јадиковати. Ти бираш сваки дан, сваким потезом одређујеш своју будућност. И што пре то увидиш и престанеш да сумњаш у себе, тиме боље. Учини себи услугу и ућуткај те демоне у себи што кажу да није изводљиво. Учини себи услугу и немој да слушаш људе који се боје промене, па због тога и тебе криткују. Послушај себе, своје срце... Шта је то што ти помера свет, а тренутно је недостижно? Хајде, усуди се, разисли. Знам да знаш шта је то. Сада је дошао момента да самом себи признаш.

Али запамти, снови се не остварују тако лако. Треба пуно труда, рада, времен, треба претрпети пуно падова и лоших изговора. Што туђих, што својих. Сећам се, пре две године сам их имала и ја..Било је пуно добрих изговора од мањак финасијских средстава, због тога што сам запослено лице, што немам удружење преко којег бих учествовала у остварење сопствених снова. А у суштини све је то био само страх. Страх од новог, страх од не познатог. Нисам имала никога да ми шапне тајну успеха борбе против таме зване страх.. Просто је, само закорачи у ту таму и невероватно али ће страх побећи попут поплашене веверице... И тако сваки дан, померај границе... сањај и смишљај, прилика ће се указати а  на теби је да је уграбиш. Сваки пут постави себи изазов, од којег ће ти се него следити од страха... То је једин пут напретка...Сада и даљe немам пара, и даље имам обавеза према предузећу, али имам подршку, има ментора да ме усмери  и помогне.

Можда сам само луда опијена тренутним успехом и осећајем да те прихватају и подржавају, али прија. После пар година константног падања почела сам да се борим, за себе, за своју будућноост, за остваривање потенцијал, померање граница.. Ко зна шта ће ми све то донети, добро или лоше.. Али опет, о неким стварима ћу „мислити сутра“.

Желим да кажем, покажем и докажем да су снови оствариви. Да после пада не треба одустати, него устати обрисати прашину са крвавих колена и наставити даље. Нема стајања, нема одустајања. Јер ниједна особа не треба себи да дозволи да стане.  Одустајање је луксуз који није прихватљив, никада, никоме! Константан рад мора донети резулатеа, каkве то само зависи од тебе. Да ли ћеш бити задовољан резулатитам и то опет зависи само од тебе. 

Питање је да ли ћеш моћи себи за 20 година да опростиш? Да ли ћеш се погледати у огледало и рећи: ти си барем покушао? Или ћеш у пролазу угледати познато лице са по којом бором и погледом пуним разочарења? Да ли можеш сам себе да приуштиш да будућег себе разочараш јер сада немаш петље?

piše:

Aleksandra Borzaš (Novi Kneževac , Srbija)

Lost in search

You've all heard, you had to hear it. Even if you do not watch TV or read the newspapers that your neighbor regularly browses with morning coffee, though you had to hear it. Everything buzzed about it for days, about the missing girl!

Days passed, old newspapers piled up at the same neighbor, and the TV program has followed its scheme, but still there was no progress in the search for her. As usual we counted days, the planet Earth, and we in it. Some usual day out of the sea of the same ones, I’d look or read, the breaking news, to find out what happened to her, but was left without the turn of events. And I thought about it ... Well actually I didn’t, I'm lying, because after all we all have our own demons with which we must deal. You might think I'm a bad person because of this. No worries!

Her lifeless body was found, the lifeless body of the child. I rub my eyes in disbelief, yet somehow I realize that it was an inevitable sequence of events. All that, wakes me from some kind of sleep and suddenly makes me restless. So many thoughts chaotically circling through my head like a moth that rushes toward the light source. I started up from sleep mode, I’m thinking.

What developments! My consciousness is not able to accept such an epilogue. It's like watching "True Detective" and not a regular news broadcast. You will say that the perpetrator was mentally ill- you will give him amnesty with it. No, the last what he could be is a vagarious person. He's an evil seed of death that began its development. Man do not allow to develop into a black flower, mow it while you still have time.

Anger is the ruler of our hearts. Before our eyes looms a dark curtain of hatred towards the one who took one youth in this world. The worst is when the animal is awoken in man. You do not want to identify yourself with a cold-blooded killer. No, we do not need to think how to punish him. Let it be done by those who are responsible for the condemnation and punishment. Still we do not stay mute and useless after all! The real battle yet awaits us, each one of us. Rest in peace!

Whoever thinks this murder is an isolated event, I would call them irresponsible and reckless. This act is only a confirmation of a deep crisis of morality and consciousness in which we are, and from which we need to pull out, or break away from it. How?

How to change the social consciousness? What to do in order to save our lives from the evil that surrounds us? (Rhetorical question)

We need a radical change of the condition in which the society is as a whole. Yet it is not easy to change the system. It doesn’t go overnight. Every individual should be changed, every free ME, so we could even think about the general changes in the community. And everyone must agree to first change themselves in order to continue to provide assistance in achieving a higher purpose. Everything actually depends only on us and on our approach to life. It depends on how we treat the world around us.

We live in a strange time, in the time of storm. I assume that there was no generation that felt different, but it seems to me, never has a man been so close and similar to that "monkey" as they are today. I'd rather have that monkey called hyena ... And a drama is played on the stage of society. Hopefully it will not turn into a tragedy as it is in the case of the sad girl.

                                          

I wanted to tell you with this text, dear reader, how the spears about your and my world break, in about our lives. I wanted to tell you to continue, or if you have not already to start to fight for yourself and your peace, because only when we all find peace in ourselves, the peace will be created around us.

Izgubljeni u potrazi

Svi ste čuli, morali ste čuti. Makar i ne gledali televiziju ili ne čitali novine koje vaš komšija redovno lista uz jutarnju kafu, ipak ste morali čuti. Danima je sve brujalo o tome, o nestaloj djevojčici!

Prolazili su dani, gomilale su se stare novine kod tog istog komšije, a i televizijski program je pratio svoju shemu, no ipak nikakvog pomaka u potrazi za njom nije bilo. Uobičajno smo brojali dane, planeta Zemlja i mi na njoj. Ponekog uobičajnog dana iz mora istih, pogledao bih ili pročitao, udarne vijesti, kako bih saznao šta joj se desilo, ali ostajao sam uskraćen za rasplet.  I mislio sam ja o tome... Ma zapravo i nijesam, lažem, jer ipak svi mi imamo neke svoje demone sa kojima se moramo izboriti. Možda mislite da sam zbog ovoga loš čovjek. Ne mari!

Pronađeno je njeno beživotno tijelo, beživotno tijelo djeteta. Trljam svoje oči u nevjerici, a opet na neki način shvatam da je to bio neminovan slijed događaja. Sve to me budi iz neke vrste sna i odjednom me čini nemirnim. Toliko misli koje kruže glavom haoticno kao leptirica koja juri ka izvoru svjetlosti. Pokrenuo sam se iz stanja mirovanja, razmišljam.

Kakav razvoj situacije! Moja svijest još ne može da prihvati takav epilog. Kao da gledam “Prave detektive”, a ne običnu informativnu emisiju. Kazaćete da je počinitelj nervni bolesnik - pomilovaćete ga time. Ne, posljednje šta bi mogao biti je neuračunljiva osoba. On je zlo sjeme smrti koje je počinjalo svoj razvoj. Ne dozvoli čovječe da izraste u crni cvijet, pokosi ga dok još imaš vremena.

Bijes je vladar naših srca. Pred našim očima nadvija se tamna zavjesa mržnje prema onome koji je uzeo jednu mladost ovom svijetu. Najgore je kad se životinja probudi u čovjeku. Ne želite da se poistovjetite sa hladnokrvnim ubicom. Ne, mi ne treba da razmišljamo kako ga kazniti. Neka to rade oni koji su zaduženi za osuđivanje i kažnjavanje. Ipak ne ostajmo nijemi i beskorisni nakon svega! Prava borba nas tek čeka, svakog od nas. Počivaj u miru!

Ko god misli da je ovo ubistvo izolovan događaj, nazvao bih ga neodgovornim i lakomislenim. Ovakav čin je samo potvrda duboke krize morala i svijesti u kojoj smo, a iz koje se treba iščupati, ili se od nje otrgnuti. Kako?

Kako promijeniti socijalnu svijest? Sta učiniti kako bismo sačuvali svoje živote od zla koje nas okružuje? (retoričko pitanje)

Potrebna nam je korjenita promjena stanja u kojem se društvo nalazi kao cjelina. No ipak nije lako mijenjati sistem. Ne ide to preko noći. Treba izmijeniti svakog pojedinca, svako slobodno JA, kako bismo uopšte i pomislili na promjene u zajednici. I mora svako pristati da prvo mijenja sebe kako bi dalje pružio pomoć u postizanju nekog višeg cilja. Sve zapravo zavisi isključivo od nas i od našeg pristupa životu. Zavisi od toga kako se ophodimo prema svijetu koji nas okružuje.

Živimo u čudnom vremenu, u vremenu nevremena. Pretpostavljam da nije postojala generacija koja se osjećala drugačije, ali mi se čini da nikad kao danas čovjek nije bio tako blizak i sličan onom "majmunu". Ja bih radije tog majmuna nazvao hijenom... I odigrava se drama na pozornici društva. Nadajmo se da se neće pretvoriti u tragediju kao u slučaju tužne djevojčice.

Htio sam ovim tekstom da ti kažem, dragi čitaoče, kako se u meni lome koplja u vezi sa tvojim i mojim svijetom, u vezi sa našim životima. Htio sam ti reći i da nastaviš, ili ako već nisi da počneš da se boriš za sebe i svoj mir, jer tek onda kad svi pronađemo mir u nama samima, on će se stvoriti i oko nas.

Man-woman.

The use of the masculine gender in the names of professions is a reality in Montenegro. Such use has become so prevalent that led up to be accepted as normative and the only right path. Should the question of sexism and stereotypes in language be ignored? Language as a mean of communication is a living organism, which, according to its nature, changes over time. The concept of social beings includes the concept of linguistic beings, and the topic of the relationship between language and society becomes inexhaustible. Formed together, society and language can only survive like that, the possibility of existence of one without the other. Every human culture has the kind of language according to their needs, to effectively achieve the basic role of an instrument of society and culture. Any changes that are happening in society necessarily reflect in the language, especially in its lexical-semantic level.

Montenegrin society, with its linguistic determinants shows a high degree of discrimination based on gender division. Montenegrin culture, with its specific codes of behavior, which are deeply rooted in tradition, legends and myths in which women are considered to be subjected. That type of culture spawned the construction of man-woman a phrase used for the woman which is characterized by the best human characteristics. Female children in Montenegrin society are not children but šćeri (a word used in colloquial speech to say it’s a daughter), so in Montenegrin language phrase that has been established I have two children and three daughters (šćeri) for two sons and three daughters.

However, we are witnesses that in the media and in everyday life, more and more encounters with the use of the feminine gender forms to indicate titles and women. Also, various studies have shown that in recent textbooks strictly take into account that in the language, illustrations, texts, maintains the equality of the sexes. Gender-disaggregated orientation in textbooks reflected in his address to the students consistently in the forms of both male and female. Despite all the efforts to combat stereotypical determinants of language in Montenegro shows still resistance to this kind of expression. Many argue that such frequent use of certain terms of representing and forcing reliance on the emancipator trends, rather than a real need for these expressions. Again, there is a problem, many of these terms are not pronounced properly, so there is an even greater confusion, because everyone makes his own coin: prvoborkinja (a female which fought in a war), female surgeon, philosopher, academician, Secretary, Chancellor - many sound clumsy and strange. Names for female occupations are just one of them, but very visible. Psychologist with us or female surgeon in Croatian can cause great tonal repulsion due to the unaccustomed  use of these words. Hence qualifications that these words are clumsy and contrived can cause a real resistance.

People are not afraid of words, but because of what use of such a word symbolizes. So the word, it is not dangerous, but its metaphor. The use of such words, clumsy, or not, means something much bigger. Acknowledging the word, we recognize the woman. Acknowledging a woman, we change somewhat the order of things in the society. By changing the order of things in society, we are changing our universe. And, it is a large-scale earthquake. This earthquake is best controlled at its very root, that is, to accuse a word that is ugly, and that she herself is discouraged and to be withdrawn to the mothy, dusty dictionaries and books. Ideological background of linguistics is invisible, but it is an essential part of the story. Give the woman a word and find the word for a woman's occupation, means to empower women, and empowered woman, either economically, or professionally, either through their awareness, there lays the power, and can be potentially dangerous. By empowering women, in one radicalized form, it could mean to strengthen the enemy. Therefore, male vulnerability due to threat to their domination, becomes understandable only when interpreted in terms of power relations and distribution of power.

picture taken from www.cdm.me

„Čoek-žena“

Upotreba muškog roda u nazivima profesija je realnost u Crnoj Gori. Takva upotreba postala je toliko učestala da je dovela do tog da se prihvata kao normativna i jedino ispravna. Postavlja se pitanje: Da li se pitanje seksizma i stereotipa u jeziku smije zanemariti? Jezik kao sredstvo komunikacije je živa materija koja se, shodno svojoj prirodi, vremenom mijenja. Pojam društvenog bića uključuje i pojam jezičkog bića, a tema odnosa jezika i društva postaje neiscrpna. Nastali zajedno, društvo i jezik samo tako i opstaju, jedno bez drugog izgubilo bi mogućnost svoga postajanja. Svaka ljudska kultura ima onakav jezik kakav im je potreban da efikasno ostvaruje osnovnu ulogu instrumenta društva i kulture. Sve promjene koje se dešavaju u društvu nužno se odražavaju na jezik, posebno na njegov leksičko-semantički nivo.

Crnogorsko društvo sa svojim jezičkim odrednicama pokazalo je visok stepen diskriminicaije zasnovane na rodnoj podjeli. Crnogorska kultura je, svojim posebnim  kodovima u  ponašanju, duboko ukorjenjena u tradiciji, legendama i mitovima u kojima je žena podređena. Takav vid kulture iznjedrio je konstrukciju čovjek-žena za ženu koja se odlikuje najboljim ljudskim osobinama. Ženski porod u crnogorskom društvu nijesu djeca nego šćeri pa je tako u crnogorskom jeziku ustaljena rečenica imam dva djeteta i tri šćeri za porod koji sačinjavaju dva sina i tri kćeri.

Ipak, svjedoci smo da se u pojedinim medijima, pa i u svakodnevnom životu, sve češće srijećemo sa korišćenjem formi ženskog roda za označavanje zanimanja i titula žena. Takođe, razna istraživanja su pokazala da se u novijim udžbenicima strogo vodi računa da se i u jeziku, ilustracijama, tekstovima održava ravnopravnost polova. Rodnosenzitivna orjentacija u udžbenicima ogleda se i u obraćanju učenicima dosledno u oblicima i muškog i ženskog roda. Uprkos svim naporima da se suzbiju stereotipne odrednice u jeziku, u Crnoj Gori je i dalje prisutan otpor prema ovakvom izražavanju. Mnogi tvrde da ovako učestalo korišćenja pojedinih izraza više predstavlja forsiranje i povođenje za emancipatorskim trendovima, nego li stvarnu potrebu za tim izrazima. Opet, tu je i problem što mnogi ove izraze ne izgovaraju pravilno, pa se stvara još veća konfuzija, jer svako pravi svoje kovanice: prvoborkinja, hiruržica (hirurškinja), filozofkinja, akademkinja, sekretarka, kancelarka - mnogima zvuče rogobatno i strano. Nazivi za ženska zanimanja samo je jedno od njih, ali vrlo vidljivo. Psihološkinja kod nas ili kiruržica u Hrvatskoj, može da izazove veliku zvukovnu odbojnost zbog nenaviknutosti na upotrebu tih riječi. Odatle kvalifikacija da su te riječi rogobatne i isforsirane, a mogu i da izazovu zaista pravi otpor.

Nijesu ljudi uplašeni zbog riječi, nego zbog onoga što upotreba takve riječi simbolizuje. Dakle, nije opasna riječ, nego njena metafora. Upotreba jedne takve riječi, rogobatne, ili ne, znači nešto mnogo krupnije. Priznavši riječ, priznajemo ženu. Priznavši ženu, mijenjamo, donekle, poredak stvari u društvu. Mijenjanjem poretka stvari u društvu, mijenjamo naš univerzum. A, to je potres velikih razmjera. Taj potres se najbolje suzbija u samom korijenu, a to znači optužiti riječ da je ružna, pa da se ona sama obeshrabri i povuče u moljčanu prašinu rječnika i knjiga. Ideološka pozadina ove lingvistike nevidljiva je, ali predstavlja suštinski dio priče. Dati ženi riječ i iznaći riječ za ženino zanimanje, znači osnažiti ženu, a osnažena žena, bilo ekonomski, bilo profesionalno, bilo kroz svoju osviješćenost, velika je snaga, potencijalno i opasna. Osnažiti ženu, dakle u jednoj radikalizovanoj formi, moglo bi da znači osnažiti neprijatelja. Stoga, muška ugroženost usljed ugroženosti njihove dominacije, postaje shvatljiva tek kada se tumači na planu odnosa snaga i raspodjele moći.

picture taken from www.cdm.me

Young Macedonians see the future out of the country.

Many young people in Macedonia the exit out of the difficult economic situation and a better tomorrow see in the EU countries or possibly the United States, in fact everywhere, just not in their home country.In Macedonia another local elections have just finished. The citizens have used their democratic right to vote and elected local government which will take care of them in the next four years. Those who have closely followed the campaign, say that the on the pre-election promises, menu, was no place for the essential questions and answers to problems that are for many years tormenting citizens, and they are, above all, a high rate of unemployment and a low standard, and that a dominant position had nationalist rhetoric.

Intellectuals going

A great indifference and inferiority among youth is evident, especially students, those who should be generators and critical mass of society. Recent research detected more massive departure of young people, especially intellectuals from Macedonia, who most often in Western Europe seek a better tomorrow. This trend of "brain drain" is becoming increasingly worrying and themes numerous formal and informal meetings of youth.

Aleksandra, Milena, Sara, and Dejan Arbend are third-year students at the Faculty of Economics at the State University, 'Saint Cyril and Methodius University' in Skopje. They are my coleagues from college with whom I often talk about everyday problems. We are concerned about the current social and economic situation and our perspective. Like many, the exit out from this situation and a better tomorrow they see in the EU countries or possibly the United States,  in fact everywhere, just not in their home country.

During the pre-election campaign, in the second round, a debate was heald on youth unemployment and the brain drain trend in Macedonia. The participants in this debate were representatives of youth from 14 political parties. They offered various solutions to the problem of youth unemployment and the mass leaving the country, but they also were convinced that the economic problems of young people do not have ethnic and religious element-they refer to the whole society. Analis results of past local elections indicated that ethnicity was the key to getting votes, and the strategies of political parties that obviously knows how to get "cheap votes". 

Last month, for political reasons, youth of Albanian and Macedonian ethnicity protested, they fought among each other and devastated Skopje. Chaos ruled for days. Citizens felt insecure and were afraid to move freely. Interethnic relations are fragile. It takes a little to come to a conflict that are often repeated constantly in the last decade. The economic and political crisis in the country's rules for a long time now.

Protests in Macedonia. Photo taken from: Blic.rs

What is it in this country that a young and promising man, an intellectual can hope for? Why should they stay in their native country if there is no other reason except that it was his native country, and when they are there persona non grata? What is the motive why would the young and highly qualified staff remain in the country where the dominant employer is public administration, and conditions of employment, in most cases, everything except what is needed-adequate knowledge, predispositions and the ability for a particular job? These are questions that every young person aware of the alarming situation in the country sets. These issues revolve in mind of the whole Macedonian youth, regardless of ethnicity or religious affiliation.Economic experts point out that human resources as a factor of production are very important for the growth and development of the country, especially for the Balkan countries, which are in development and in which the permanent loss of skilled labor is equivalent impoverishment, which will undoubtedly be reflected in all aspects of society .

Written by Admir Fazlagić. 
A young journalist who writes for numerous national and international media outlets.
Also a student of Faculty of Economics' St. "Cyril and Methodius" in Skopje.

Raising the level of education

Ministry of Education and Science of the Republic of Macedonia last September announced the development of a national strategy which will systematically approach solving the problem of emigration of highly educated and skilled personnel from the country. So far for now, it doesn’t have a significant effect.

My two best friends, graduate doctors of general medicine, just packed their bags and are going to Germany with the hope that their knowledge will be respected and that there is perspective for them. Not slowly, but surely every day, the phenomenon of brain drain is taking it’s tool.

According to past experience, palliative and short-term measures (such as a significant increase in inflation, one-time public capital investment) in order to reduce unemployment and stopping the brain drain, have not succeeded, and do not provide lasting results.

However, the improvement of the situation could be expected as a result of measures with long-term, lasting effects. Gradually changing the structure of the Macedonian economy and raising the level of education and skills of the workforce, are seemingly best way to achieve this goal. 

Will it stop, or at least neutralize, the brain drain, a highly expressed trend in the Balkan countries, and how, remains an enigma.